Why did you create this site?
Since becoming single again I have spent nearly $1,000 on premium features on Bumble, Hinge, Tinder, and eHarmony. None of this investment resulted in a single date, which is unfortunately quite common for many male users of dating apps. The apps have a paradoxic financial incentive to keep you frustrated just enough to continuously spend money.
Edit: This website has been more productive in three months than the dating apps. What I am hearing from the people I have met is that they too are burned out by them.
I am not owed attention from any woman using dating apps. But after swiping endlessly and constant ghosting it has taken a toll on my mental health and wellness.
Why do you think this will work?
I have no reason to believe it will.
I can either sit idly by and let the dating app algorithms continue to not work in my favor, or I can be proactive and do something about it. And just based on what has arrived in the inbox, things appear to be working…
Are you still on dating apps?
Begrudgingly, yes.
Why not try and meet someone at work or have friends recommend someone?
I work in IT, and the environment lives up to the male dominated stereotype. My friends do not know anyone either.
Have you tried speed dating?
Yes. I have had to email the organizers because they do not bother with the courtesy to even tell you that no one matched. This indignity has also been mentally exhausting.
Why not go out and try to meet people that way?
If that tactic were successful this site would not need to exist.
Don’t you feel embarrassed by this ridiculousness?
Oh, absolutely. But what has really been mystifying is the hostility to trying to advocate for myself in other public forums. I’m a man who is being open and honest about this struggle in the hopes that it can lead to a healthy outcome.
What is something that you did not anticipate from setting up this site?
It has given me insightful content to explore with the assistance of my counselor. Some women have been very forward offering a date on first contact, but quixotically do not want to answer introductory questions about themselves.
Will you be identifying the people you interact with publicly?
I am a part of a community where consent and trust are sacrosanct. It would reflect poorly on me to divulge the personal identifying information of anyone who voluntarily participated in this experiment. That would also discourage others from participating.
Why Beardy Date?
OnlyKens.com was taken.
What do you hope to achieve with this?
The ideal dating situation would be going out with a variety of people to explore what is out there. Even if we do not have a spark, the discovery experience alone is worthwhile.
Ultimately I want to delete this whole thing, have a new story to tell, and begin a new chapter in life with a committed companion.